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Darkside Management
by Tom Howard [Tom is a fantasy and science fiction short story writer living in Little Rock, Arkansas. He thanks his family and friends for their inspiration and the Central Arkansas Speculative Fiction Writers' Group for their perspiration.] |
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Previous Shorts Basis by Rob Perrier Blade or Mist by Nichole Galle Reaching Out by Judith Pratt Observe by Beth Robertson __________________ |
Maggie, bored and searching for a more exciting job in the want ads, looked up when the policeman entered her office.
The small man he held by the scruff of the neck smiled at her, a sad half-hearted smile she’d seen too often.
“Mr. London, what have you done?” Maggie pushed the spectacles up on her nose and didn’t stand.
He twisted his hat in his hands. “I thought they were self-serve sheep, I swear.”
“You know this man, miss?” The policeman dropped the client and wiped his hands as if he’d been touching sheep dung. Knowing Harry, he might have.
“I’m afraid I do,” she said. “What seems to be the problem?”
“We found him at the petting zoo, terrorizing a couple of sheep. He insisted we come here on the way to the station. Said you’d make it worth my while.”
She smiled. “Thank you. We will. Would you like some coffee?”
“No. Thank you.” The officer looked around the room. “What kind of place is this? I’ve never heard of Darkside Management.”
She wasn’t surprised he didn’t remember being here. They never did. “We’re a customer service firm that integrates unique clientele into everyday society.”
The officer scowled at Harry as if he didn’t see anything unique about a guy lurking in the children’s zoo.
“Sort of like social services?” he asked.
She nodded although Darkside Management was nothing like social services. Most of their job was cleaning up messes left by their supernatural clients. Messes like this. She glanced at her calendar, hoping a vampire or a zombie didn’t have an appointment this evening.
Harry growled, and Maggie frowned at him. Late in the day, he already felt the effects of tonight’s full moon. The policeman might have been dinner if he’d caught Harry an hour later.
“Might not need to go to the station if we can work out some sort of restitution,” the policeman said. “For the zoo.”
“Yes, for the zoo. I understand,” Maggie said. “Cash?”
He nodded.
Harry growled again, and Maggie shot him a warning glance and opened her drawer. She placed a stack of bills on the top of her desk. “I trust this will be enough?”
The policeman stepped forward with his eyes wide. Maggie recalled Officer Tennyson from earlier “restitutions.” He’d been here several times, usually with Harry in tow.
“Coffee, Mr. London?” she asked Harry. She disliked him sniffing around the policeman, but with the sun sinking on the horizon, he didn’t have a lot of self-control. Actually, in the middle of the day, Harry didn’t have a lot of restraint. Like humans, there were different classes of werewolves. Harry was a shabby human and an even shabbier wolf.
And he was inching too close to Officer Tennyson.
“Mr. London!” Maggie shouted. “Sit.” She had just vacuumed the office. Getting bloodstains out of the carpet would take her all night.
The little man’s eyes widened, and he stepped back. Like most clients, he knew her glare could be deadly.
“Will that be enough, officer?” She handed the man a stack of cash. She had to get him out of here before Harry tore him apart.
He nodded, not taking his eyes off the money. He didn’t count it but stuffed it in his pockets. She’d remove it when she escorted him out. He’d never remember being here.
The man turned to go, but it was too late. Harry’s fangs were out, and he sprang.
In a flash, Maggie slithered from behind her desk and slapped her coils down between the officer and snarling Harry.
The policeman screamed and stumbled backward when he saw Maggie’s bottom half was reptilian. He grabbed for his gun.
Harry, out of his mind with moon mania and enraged that someone had gotten between him and his prey, ripped into Maggie’s back. His claws couldn’t damage her scales, but his fangs might.
Focusing on the officer’s weapon, Maggie stunned Harry by flicking him through a table and against the wall. Damn, she’d have to put that busted table on Harry’s tab. She took advantage of the policeman’s paralysis to wrap him in her coils.
“What are you?” he asked between gasps.
She ignored him, using some of her coils to snare Harry, now almost completely in his wolf form. Her first inclination was to crush both of them, but the management disproved of killing paying clients. And killing a cop always brought unwanted attention. Still, she had no desire to be shot.
The officer’s eyes bulged as she tightened her coils, not enough to break bones but enough to cut off his air. With his arms pinned to his sides, she didn’t expect him to squeeze the trigger, but he did. A sharp pain exploded low on her tail. The blast was muffled, but she couldn’t let him fire again.
She pulled him up close and fixed her gaze on him. Angry enough to turn him into a stone statue, she only peered deep enough to knock him unconscious.
Harry snarled and fought her, and she gave him a good shake as Officer Tennyson passed out. She released the man and let him sink to the floor. If he’d just taken a sip of the coffee, he’d have left and not recalled Darkside Management or Harry.
She sighed as she held Harry in a corner. Where was a steel cage when she needed it? Manacles would have to do.
She kept some in her desk. Along with a first-aid kit.
Her wound was a superficial graze. She’d patch it after she dealt with the wolf.
Checking the policeman, she found him alive. She lifted him and placed him in a chair. Harry howled, and she slipped a coil around his mouth. She didn’t have enough memory potion for the entire building.
She suspended Harry above her desk and located the manacles and first-aid kit. He fought her, but she was careful to keep him away from her more vulnerable human-appearing half. She opened the panic room door and slung him into the padded cell. At least she couldn’t hear him howling in the soundproof room.
She sprayed antiseptic on the furrow in her scales and wrapped a bandage around it. She’d been lucky. But the office was a mess. She’d have some explaining to do in the morning. She took out the memory potion and trickled a couple drops into the officer’s mouth. She also removed the money she’d given him. One of the maintenance Igors would move him to an alley before he woke. In the morning, he wouldn’t recall how close he’d come to losing his life. He’d wander back to the station convinced he’d been working too hard and taken a nap.
She retrieved a broom and dustpan from the supply closet. At least there weren’t any bloodstains this time. The few drops she’d shed had left no mark.
She sighed. Maybe she didn’t need a more exciting job after all.
The small man he held by the scruff of the neck smiled at her, a sad half-hearted smile she’d seen too often.
“Mr. London, what have you done?” Maggie pushed the spectacles up on her nose and didn’t stand.
He twisted his hat in his hands. “I thought they were self-serve sheep, I swear.”
“You know this man, miss?” The policeman dropped the client and wiped his hands as if he’d been touching sheep dung. Knowing Harry, he might have.
“I’m afraid I do,” she said. “What seems to be the problem?”
“We found him at the petting zoo, terrorizing a couple of sheep. He insisted we come here on the way to the station. Said you’d make it worth my while.”
She smiled. “Thank you. We will. Would you like some coffee?”
“No. Thank you.” The officer looked around the room. “What kind of place is this? I’ve never heard of Darkside Management.”
She wasn’t surprised he didn’t remember being here. They never did. “We’re a customer service firm that integrates unique clientele into everyday society.”
The officer scowled at Harry as if he didn’t see anything unique about a guy lurking in the children’s zoo.
“Sort of like social services?” he asked.
She nodded although Darkside Management was nothing like social services. Most of their job was cleaning up messes left by their supernatural clients. Messes like this. She glanced at her calendar, hoping a vampire or a zombie didn’t have an appointment this evening.
Harry growled, and Maggie frowned at him. Late in the day, he already felt the effects of tonight’s full moon. The policeman might have been dinner if he’d caught Harry an hour later.
“Might not need to go to the station if we can work out some sort of restitution,” the policeman said. “For the zoo.”
“Yes, for the zoo. I understand,” Maggie said. “Cash?”
He nodded.
Harry growled again, and Maggie shot him a warning glance and opened her drawer. She placed a stack of bills on the top of her desk. “I trust this will be enough?”
The policeman stepped forward with his eyes wide. Maggie recalled Officer Tennyson from earlier “restitutions.” He’d been here several times, usually with Harry in tow.
“Coffee, Mr. London?” she asked Harry. She disliked him sniffing around the policeman, but with the sun sinking on the horizon, he didn’t have a lot of self-control. Actually, in the middle of the day, Harry didn’t have a lot of restraint. Like humans, there were different classes of werewolves. Harry was a shabby human and an even shabbier wolf.
And he was inching too close to Officer Tennyson.
“Mr. London!” Maggie shouted. “Sit.” She had just vacuumed the office. Getting bloodstains out of the carpet would take her all night.
The little man’s eyes widened, and he stepped back. Like most clients, he knew her glare could be deadly.
“Will that be enough, officer?” She handed the man a stack of cash. She had to get him out of here before Harry tore him apart.
He nodded, not taking his eyes off the money. He didn’t count it but stuffed it in his pockets. She’d remove it when she escorted him out. He’d never remember being here.
The man turned to go, but it was too late. Harry’s fangs were out, and he sprang.
In a flash, Maggie slithered from behind her desk and slapped her coils down between the officer and snarling Harry.
The policeman screamed and stumbled backward when he saw Maggie’s bottom half was reptilian. He grabbed for his gun.
Harry, out of his mind with moon mania and enraged that someone had gotten between him and his prey, ripped into Maggie’s back. His claws couldn’t damage her scales, but his fangs might.
Focusing on the officer’s weapon, Maggie stunned Harry by flicking him through a table and against the wall. Damn, she’d have to put that busted table on Harry’s tab. She took advantage of the policeman’s paralysis to wrap him in her coils.
“What are you?” he asked between gasps.
She ignored him, using some of her coils to snare Harry, now almost completely in his wolf form. Her first inclination was to crush both of them, but the management disproved of killing paying clients. And killing a cop always brought unwanted attention. Still, she had no desire to be shot.
The officer’s eyes bulged as she tightened her coils, not enough to break bones but enough to cut off his air. With his arms pinned to his sides, she didn’t expect him to squeeze the trigger, but he did. A sharp pain exploded low on her tail. The blast was muffled, but she couldn’t let him fire again.
She pulled him up close and fixed her gaze on him. Angry enough to turn him into a stone statue, she only peered deep enough to knock him unconscious.
Harry snarled and fought her, and she gave him a good shake as Officer Tennyson passed out. She released the man and let him sink to the floor. If he’d just taken a sip of the coffee, he’d have left and not recalled Darkside Management or Harry.
She sighed as she held Harry in a corner. Where was a steel cage when she needed it? Manacles would have to do.
She kept some in her desk. Along with a first-aid kit.
Her wound was a superficial graze. She’d patch it after she dealt with the wolf.
Checking the policeman, she found him alive. She lifted him and placed him in a chair. Harry howled, and she slipped a coil around his mouth. She didn’t have enough memory potion for the entire building.
She suspended Harry above her desk and located the manacles and first-aid kit. He fought her, but she was careful to keep him away from her more vulnerable human-appearing half. She opened the panic room door and slung him into the padded cell. At least she couldn’t hear him howling in the soundproof room.
She sprayed antiseptic on the furrow in her scales and wrapped a bandage around it. She’d been lucky. But the office was a mess. She’d have some explaining to do in the morning. She took out the memory potion and trickled a couple drops into the officer’s mouth. She also removed the money she’d given him. One of the maintenance Igors would move him to an alley before he woke. In the morning, he wouldn’t recall how close he’d come to losing his life. He’d wander back to the station convinced he’d been working too hard and taken a nap.
She retrieved a broom and dustpan from the supply closet. At least there weren’t any bloodstains this time. The few drops she’d shed had left no mark.
She sighed. Maybe she didn’t need a more exciting job after all.
